my first salvia-ride. to hell and (luckily) back!

[Guybrush]

hi!

so, here is my first post (except the welcome-post)
its about my first salvia-experience, wich was, well....interesting. =)

here it goes. fasten your seatbelts.
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salvia divinorum
15.11.03
10x extract
set and setting: at home by a friend with some people and my girlfriend.
not realy much was setted.... =)
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i tried the extract many times, but there was nothing but a soft feeling of high.
not psychedelic at all. i thought i was one of these people who are not able to fly with salvia.
(not a very nice thought - flightless, a dodo...)

then some evening at friends, i had the salvia with me, and because it didnt work with me i gave it
to the others. there where sitting there, giggeling, and telling what funny things they see,
all about very pleasant things. not very spectacular.

i decided to try it once more. i made me a big hit in the bong, and then i left the room to go to toilet.
my girlfriend then put some more in the head, because she thought, maybe i have to smoke more to
get some flight. (she did not know that i thought that too when i was filling the head. =)

i came back, sit down, and took the bong. i wasnt expecting anything to happen, so i went on
without much thinking. like smoking pot.
i smoked....then it get very strange and hard to describe and to remember.
i remember that i leaned back, gave the bong away.
i closed my eyes. my body felt like thousand little needles where tickeling me.
was not hurting, felt quite pleasant (this should be change soon)
this feeling where twisting, like my body was turning. not the whole body around an axis,
but as the body was twisting itself round and round, like a spiral that gets more and more twisted.
optical i "saw" something like a landscape, with little dwarfs or beeings, very funny,
like they sang all the time some funny kiddie-songs and dancing some stupid dances.
all very "stupid" or crazy. (stupid like funny, not bad stupid. a bit like the humor of monty python.)
there was a carussel with funny things, all was colored in diagonal stripes, mostly red-white.
like candy-sticks and stuff. there was a bright touch of "christmas" in all.
like christmastrees, all very coolorfull and shining.

the body-feeling was getting intenser every second. at some point it was getting too intense.
not pleasant any more. i was afraid that this feeling, this twisting, would mangle my body and my mind.
like i was squeezed to press out every fluid in me. the vision of a rolling walz over that i was
windet was comming up. no, like i was the walz - and the thing around it wich it was winding.
like i was the carpet of the reality wich was windet up. very strange.

it was getting too much. then i rememberd: i often read, that with salvia, you should do it with
closed eyes, otherway, if you open your eyes you could "break" the vision.
so i opened my eyes to stop this.

but it didnt stop. no chance. at this point a slightly panic came up in my mind.
i did not have optical hallucinations. the room looked normal, the people who sat there too.
but i could not understand it. all realtion to reality was lost. room? whats that?
people...ok, but who the hell are they? what is "they"? what am i? what? ...?
all dissolved to absolute meaningless. i had no "system" to measure all this.

behind me (there was a tv, a movie about drugs was on) was a voice, telling about drugs and stuff.
i did not remember the tv....only this woman-voice talking about drugs and reality and doors to other realities.
i did "understand" that, allthough i did not understand my surrounding.

i turned around. and then something so overwhelming was comming right for me.
from the tv there came a black "mass", like small pixel-smoke. totaly dark and black. not black,
it was the "nothing". the nothing came out of the tv and dissolved the "here and now".
and looked very 2-dimensional, like a flat picture. but the black pixels were growing.
more and more of the room was overlayed with this, and it came nearer to me. and nearer.
and the voice allthe time talked about reality and drugs and brain.

at this point i nearly lost my mind. i was afraid that i will get permanently crazy.
a wondered if this is the moment where i can observe me going crazy. forever lost.
i was getting real panik. maybe i die? maybe i get real crazy? but then...whats "me" again?
i turned around. there where all the people, they where looking at me. totaly quit.
dont they see whats coming near us? they where not reacting to the black mass.
that was irritating me. i looked around. they talked to me, i could hear this, but i could
not understand it. whats language anyway?

i turned back again. the mass was so close to me that i turned back and jumped from the couch.
i was starting to jump away, to run away.
but 2 meters in front of me was a wall. i did not realize that. that was so irrelevant. there
was some very scary black mass in my back and it tried to get me, so some animal-imstinct started to take
over my movement and reaction. i wanted to get away. anywhere. NOW!

someone grabbed my arm and was holding me back from running wild against the wall.
i looked. thats a person. but what? who? hä?
a voice: "sit down. all is good"
all people now looked real frightened at me.
i had no memory what was before this experience. no personal memory. no egomemory. nothing.
i stand there and all i knew was that something real bad was trieng to get me.
i am afraid i am getting a psychosis right now. i looked at the one who is holding me,
my face (they told me that later) was so scared, like an animal who is hunted and know it has no chance.
never had such a scare in my face (and in my mind).

i was still standing there, all was lost. the single thing that was existent was my panic.
the thing behind me. whatever that was.
(i made notices the next days - there i desribed it real wild and crazy.
like that this black pixels where some other reality, or some reality-eating thing.
like antimatter or something. it was overlaying, or eating the reality, and my space i nreality
was getting smaller and smaller, until only i was left.

again a voice:" sit down, you have smoked salvia.remember."
salvia....no guess...but very slow a bit of counsciousness came back to my terrorized, scattered mind.
i sat down. looked around. do i know these guys?
i tried to speak. "savliva?....you...? me...? ah...i know...i am here, i am guybrush right?
you are that person? i smoked salvia?"
now i remembered that i smoked this stuff.at that moment i was forgetting the black thing.
or it dissapeared. i was coming down a bit. my eyes where still wide open of panic.
my bloodpreasure must have been very critical. now i feeled my face tickling.
i hyperventilated so much that my whole body was tickling (the skin)

the next 15 minutes i sat there speechless and tried to figure out what happend to me.
the whole evening i was in a very strange state of consciousness. (the whole next 2-3 weeks i was in that state)
allways looking "holes in the sky" and thinking about what happenend. tried to find an answer.
my girlfriend was real scared about me.


the notices i made are very strange. the longer this experience is away in the past, the more
clearer it gets. and the more unspectacular too.
at least, now, i can say that not much happened at all. no big hallucinations or optics.
the bodyfeeling and the fact that it didnot stop by eye-opening was what scared me so.

i wrote something about a layered reality, like many layers and the black thing was the thing that lays
between two layers. (our reality and the "next" one. like this layers where glued together
and someone pulls this two layers apart. and between the layers there came this black pixels out.



i have to say, i went a little to fast with making such a big dose (and doubled it by accident by someone else)
i had read a lot of salvia. before i do a drug i am reading tons of stuff and spend hell of time with that.
(my girlfriend gets real nerved about that sometimes, because i cannot concentrate on other thing then.
but because i did not expect anything to happen i was unprepared. and it came so goddam quick and hard.
i was getting a real big hammer in the face.

i am not clear about, what this vision want to say me. i cannot find some spiritual information in this.
sometimes i think, some entity was there, and it showed me what reality is really all about.
but then what? what for?
then i think...i did lots of psychedelics before, and get to a point long ago, where
it was clear for me that the reality is "a living thing" wich i am part of and i am the creator of.
i got through so much of this thoughts, that i came to a point where i decided that i dont have to take psychedelics,
because now i know. and there is no need to "see this movie again". its like learning to write or walk
over and over again, when you take psychedelics again and again. sometimes you come to a point,
where you think, this is it. here i am, and here i will stay, even if i stop taking psychedelics.
(but i must say, in the last years, without taking it, i forgot it bit by bit.
so maybe i have to make new experiences sometimes to remember again.

but anyway..i am not sure what salvia was trying to tell me.
that was an overwhelming experience, but not very spiritual.

i have to say to all who think about trying salvia first time:
be very sure what you do!
set and setting is VERY neccessary with salvia i think.
have a sitter!!!!!!!!!a good one.
and put away all dangerous stuff like knives, torches, fire, etc..
if there would not have been a wall but a window, or fire, or lake or whatever, i still would
have ran into it if noone stopped me. this is truly a dangerous component of salvia.
i dont want to advise you to take it not. but be very sure and safe.
i do not advise to take it though. everone has to decide for himself, like all day in life.
but be prepared. maybe you know people who tell abouit some nice, funny, freaky things they
have seen on salvia, but remember that there are also a lot of people who had shit in the pants
and panic in the eyes. (no - i did not had shit in the pants =)


so much about my salvia-trip. hope you enjoyed the ride. =)
hope all was clear to understand in english, i tried to use words that i had in mind,
without using translator, because i was too lazy. =)


MfGuybrush


***
i have to add, this was the most intense experience in my whole life.
this was more real than any other reality i ever "saw".
i have a lot of respect since this experience. i dont know if i touch salvia again, but last time i think about it sometimes. 3 years gone, maybe its time to refresh. =)

[laughingwillow]

LOL You do a pretty good job describing a salvia experience in english, imo.

I never open my eyes.

Toostoned never used to close his.

lw

[Syd]

I also open and close my eyes throughtout the experience

[Guybrush]

thanks willow. =)

the more i write/speak in english, the more i remember.
i was not speaking english the last years so much.
i am surprised who "easy" it comes back.
i cannot speak like i think, because so many words i dont know the translation.
but thats only a matter of time i hope.


i did not plan to open my eyes, but in that moment i was happy that i remembered to open and break. so i was shocked that it did not work.

i forgot to tell:
i smoked some salviaa few weeks later, but not such a big dose.
i came back to exactly the same "fair" with the gnomes and carussels.
but the bodyfeeling did not went so far as lat time and it was very mild and "pleasant".
i wanted to say that because i read often, that with salvia you can come back to the exactly same place as you where before.
(like some say with dmt too)

but the second time salvia was a bit strange, because i had some ketamine too. very interesting mixture. =) but not do advise a purely synthetic stuff with the plant.

i think alot about to do another salvia-experiment the next time.
i have smoked some dmt some weeks ago, but without breakthrough.
but it was very different till that mild state though.
if i had one very little dose of dmt in the freezer, i would think about doing it again. but i am would be waiting for some freetime with "free mind" to do that. it had to be the perfect time, because it would be the last dose, and i dont know how to get new stuff, except to make an extraction (if it where legal of course. so this is only theoretic). but anyway, this is not about dmt....

i want to visit the salvia-reality again, this time with a big dose again, to see if i can be more prepared this time, and do not panic again. so maybe i can go through that state and look whats behind.

salvia is a very strange and special plant. dont know how to categorize it next to all the other entheogenes. but i feel that its a one wich could be quit "teachable" to me as well. (if someone likes the old teaching-methods with lots of discipline and pain. =)


i will try to let my eyes closed, maybe the opening was a too harsh break, and maybe that was the fault wich lead to the "accident".
(i would have to stand this body-feeling to go through it. but hey...its only a body-feeling at all =)
(in realtion to the state in wich i was after that, the body feeling was very pleasant and should be easy to stand.)


ah...and...
i was very very very... glad that this experience was such a "short" one. for me, mentaly it lasted nearly eternal, but in realtime it was only 10 minutes. i dont know how much more time i could have done that without permanent damage to my mind.


MfGuybrush

[laughingwillow]

I doubt there is potential brain damage involved, but who knows?

I'm not sure of the laws in your land, but we'd rather not incriminate ourself or others in these forums. (Having xyz in the freezer, ready for consumption, for instance.) A little editing may be in order....

Salvia smoked in a joint with dmt and green bud would be an interesting combination where legal, imo. The effects are quite short as well. But reported to be very interesting.

On the other hand, the mixture I describe above becomes MUCH longer acting when ingested while under the influence of other psychedelics such as lsdee or shrooms. (Where legal, of course.) Peak experiences of 30 - 45 minutes have been reported. Going in and out of salvia/dmt space multiple times between moments of "normal" reality is possible. Just add live music and shake well....

As far as subsequent salvia experiences after initial breakthrough....  Some of us have found that it begins to take less and less salvia to get to that sacred place with a little practice.

lw

[Guybrush]

oops, sorry for that, thanks that you mention it. i edited the line. i was talking about what i would like to do theoretical of course.

im not sure if i would like to mix salvia and dmt. maybe if i know both substances more. but it feels that this 2 substances are very different, and maybe its very irritating.

but who knows... =)
i think, because salvia is chemical totaly different from all other entheogens, that its special in a way, and you should not mix it.

anyone ever tried this mixture?
would be nice to read something about it. =)


MfGuybrush

[laughingwillow]

LOL I guess I did TOO good a job above, eh?

Just trust me on da salvia/dmt thingy, OK? ;')

lw

[Guybrush]

trust you on the mixing thing?

yea, so now you have to edit your post. =)

[laughingwillow]

LOL Nothing illegal about asking to be trusted. At least not yet......

Anyway, I consider dmt and sally to be similar in effect and duration of the smoking experience. Both have synergy with live music. However, the images and colors are different. Salvia tends toward the pink while the dmt experience covers a richer palette, imo.

My first sally breakthrough consisted of a giant pink ferris wheel with spokes radiating from the center that turned me inside out (a lot of pink, there.)and peeled my body from soul..

lw

[Guybrush]

one thing about salvia i see and hear very often:

a "turning", or spinning. like the body is twisting as i wrote.
and that spinning is peeling you off from the reality, or something like that.
like the spinning is detaching one from the reality.
heard this "feeling" about the spinning-thing very often from a lot of different ppl.

its not a simple turning around an axis, but a twisting. simple turning would not be so "stressfull" as this hard body-twisting.

and all my "visions about a spinning cylinder (i was part of that, or that of me..), the carussel, the candy sticks that was painted with red/white twisted lines...very much spiral-twisting with salvia. =)

MfGuybrush

[salviaalien]

smoked salvia lit a fire under my ass like a rocket with fire going thru me its terrible

[laughingwillow]

smoked salvia lit a fire under my ass like a rocket with fire going thru me its terrible

So, why would you want to smoke more salvia under those circumstances as you claim in another thread, salviaalien? That doesn't make any sense to me......

lw