Online Western Journal

[cenacle]

november 14, 2005
4:03 p.m.
red line cafe
seattle, washington

two weeks of it now, and leads but no luck...interview tomorrow at 11...last friday there was a flurry of action, but nothing yet today...the jobless work on a tighter, more desparate timeline than most employers and even those with jobs who are looking...KD & I leave for the east coast in a week...i SO want to get something to start for when we get back...it's funny how a situation such as this, or an illness, or some other crisis, can really draw a person's mind back from the furthest reaches...most of daylight is spent in the perpetual sense of wanting to resolve...today, tomorrow? An hour from now? How long must it go on, and what is next?

[cenacle]

november 17, 2005
9:12 a.m.
home
seattle, washington

interview with two guys at company the other day, went well, but the usual handshake and we'll be in touch...i think i would have blown them both for a simple 'you're hired'...yah, i'm getting worn down by this...i have 9 maybes going, and this morning sent out another 10 resumes before i'd had breakfast...yet there is no choice, the next step and the next step and the next step...recruiters do what they can, but they have a lot of beggars at their doors and only so much gruel to hand out...so i harass them every day, nicely, charmingly, but persistently...when i get work, they get their piece...simple as that...another day...on it goes...i'd like to me today not just another day though...who knows how soon the last one and days like this remembered from a different view? i don't think lack of appreciation is the way to travel...even when it's tough there is something good near to hand...there's worse to be considered, but also better too...

[cenacle]

november 20, 2005
5:03 p.m.
home
seattle, washington

late friday afternoon, when i'd given up on the week's jobhunting being a success, call came offering a 4-6 week editing job...so i have one in hand, and two full-time ones are pending...it's sticky trying to negotiate this...but I HAVE A FUCKING JOB FOR DECEMBER :twisted: & am very grateful for this, whatever coming complications or none...

now off to East Coast US to see my kinfolk & introduce them to KD...i don't wish to make this journal into some kind of mundane diary blahg so a bit more here...

the War goes badly and the idiots in DC are finally seeing that...or acting on what they've seen all along...their poll numbers suck, the little King is a liability to be seen to near...the poor & vulnerable in this country are ever more at the whim of power rats who don't give a fuck & don't even pretend to...

we have few real heroes to look toward in this country to inspire us...but i'm hopeful they will emerge...Cindy Sheehan, Patrick Fitzgerald so far...more will come out...the social climate, bad as it may seem, may change as more speak truth to power...so i hang in and keep working for better days and urge others on too...

got a plane to catch tonight

[judih]

good news
good trip
good to hear before you fly

best to you
(best to all)

[cenacle]

november 22, 2005
12:45 a.m.
friend's home
west hartford, connecticut

jobhunting, ha, those two jobs said luv ya, come back soon, we talk some more...maybe i will from necessity but a secret fuck-you to all employers who keep people interviewed hanging on the line for days...

overnight flight to my old home state, brought KD to see kin, they gushed & smiled over her...it was kind of fun to see...new blood invigorates old habit family gatherings...

tonight hung out with my friend J watching football like the old days, sans beers, heh...KD fell asleep after dinner...

so i know better what i have to do...use month of work/pay to get that better job that has eluded me for awhile...

reading the news of Empire's little king's freefall, laffing & laffing & laffing...

then stopping, & as my friend J told me, thinking about the ugliness in the world he caused, and the long time it will take to clean up...

[cenacle]

november 22, 2005
12:45 a.m.
friend's home
west hartford, connecticut

jobhunting, ha, those two jobs said luv ya, come back soon, we talk some more...maybe i will from necessity but a secret fuck-you to all employers who keep people interviewed hanging on the line for days...

overnight flight to my old home state, brought KD to see kin, they gushed & smiled over her...it was kind of fun to see...new blood invigorates old habit family gatherings...

tonight hung out with my friend J watching football like the old days, sans beers, heh...KD fell asleep after dinner...

so i know better what i have to do...use month of work/pay to get that better job that has eluded me for awhile...

reading the news of Empire's little king's freefall, laffing & laffing & laffing...

then stopping, & as my friend J told me, thinking about the ugliness in the world he caused, and the long time it will take to clean up...

[cenacle]

november 24, 2005
7:57 p.m.
friend's home
west hartford, connecticut

job recruiter calls, my job has been cancelled, their client decided they had too many people on the project, & i was canned...before starting or meeting anyone or earning a dollar...

KD met my family today & we chose to not say anything...let them have their fun & celebration with us without the stress of our real world struggle right now...mercy in some direction...

it was fun, & now to seattle to engage the battle, unexpectedly, anew...

family, there are not easy words to speak...

[cenacle]

december 1, 2005
8:52 a.m.
home
seattle, washington

i have an phone interview on friday, and one next tuesday, the new month begins for me with the hope that all new months begin...here's a chance to hit it right from the first note, and play it well and high all the way through...i've been working on the next issue of the cenacle, nearly done, keeps me calm during the long jobhunting day...lot of photos in it among the text, photos photoshopped for effect...closest i can get to being a visual artist, just as DJ'ing and mixing is the closest i get to being a musician...

the news these days is protracted & nearly all bad...promises nobody believes for better days nobody really awaits...it's like there's this feeling that as long as bush is in office and in control things cannot get better...few believe in his sincerity, his empathy, his intelligence, his autonomy of thought...he's the sad puppet some of us always knew he was...

but these are dangerous days, too, as long as his cabal remains in power & can affect things...laying back is a bad idea, and should not be considered an option...

back to it, jobhunting try...on knees ready to suck or being sucked for the sucking fucking evil dollar...that pretty much sums it...

[cenacle]

december 7, 2005
4:53 p.m.
central library downtown
seattle, washington

just come from my second in-person interview this week, both editor positions, and waiting on scheduling a third one...travel long by bus, do the shuck and jive, come out with no answer, and then the days pass without a phone call or email regarding the position chased...frustrating in a way that cannot be conveyed, but ok, there it is...nothing more to speak of right now, just moving slow with disheartenment...

hope too...yes, indeed, hope too...the irrational secret weapon...

[cenacle]

december 8, 2005
9:23 a.m.
home
seattle, washington

had an interview in redmond, home of Microsoft, yesterday, and it went well, going back to the same place this morning for another one, here's hoping the worm is turning at last...so fucking close...

nearly didn't make interview, woke up late, alarm didn't go off, so went later, then, along the way, asking a bus driver where my next bus was, she told me wrong, i was lucky someone else knew and the bus was late...

the bus driver who told me wrong was wearing a reindeer antler fuzzy hat...should've warned me, hehe...

so get this, phone call from the job i was going to, apparently i'm hired but i have to meet with more people to sign off on it...hm...eh? yah, i think so...but no meeting possible til early january...

so i think i have a job...whoohoo? heh...

[judih]

yeah!

[cenacle]

december 8, 2005 (continued)
3:06 p.m.
home
seattle, washington

the day has been intense...first a likely job, then the other one i interviewed for today came through with a definite offer, yes, now, I GOT IT!!!! NO MORE JOBHUNTING FOR AWHILE  :twisted:  :twisted:  :twisted:

[cenacle]

december 23, 2005
4:07 p.m.
home
seattle, washington

job started this week, training, setting up computer, getting used to biking to downtown seattle in rush hour traffic, a week of hands-on training in Chicago in a couple of weeks, love that city not seen it in a decade, cool way to return...

KD has gone to kinfolk town midwest where we will marry...to get things ready and relax...so i have a stretch of days til tuesday to work, get writing and publishing done, and think about what it means to marry, as if i could say yet...

but a long weekend of work...best bachelor party i would want...given that most of my long time friends are far or gone their own ways...

[cenacle]

december 27, 2005
6:30 p.m.
home
seattle, washington

likely last post of the year, maybe closing off this volume too, not sure..it told its tale, so yah, i think this entry is it...saturday night & last night both spent on bike & bus in the city, riding in the rain...saturday's ride was sentimental, saw the big lit xmas tree in downtown like last year, then traveled to my old neighborhood from 2002, to look around & remember...then found a couple of all night joints to write in & saw in Xmas morning doing my work, ipod cranking...come home in the rain & slept a along while...

last night i followed some of the same route, ending up at the same places, a sandwich shop & a doughnut shop next door, both open all night...focussed all i had on writing, wanting to bring the year to a strong finish...got home this morning about 6, SPF chat for a stretch, heh...

2005 was pretty all over the place, high and low and higher near the end...i have 5 bucks to my name tonight but paycheck coming, & anyway will be in KD's town through new year's day, returning all will be improved...but five bucks for now...have to clean & clean as i vowed...i'm grateful to be at the psychic & physical  space i'm in...i'll think of you all at my wedding sat. night...

next year, a new online journal, maybe deeper than simply changing fortunes...peace to you all, health & sometimes at least contentment too...see ya in '06 :twisted:

Raymond

[judih]

Oh six!
It's gonna be a year - for sure

have a great union
enjoy the click of the spirits
(break a wine glass for luck)

and may the year crack open its finest for you, KD and the rest of us, your spf extended family.

love to you Raymond

judih