I had the kids this afternoon/evening. No major mutanies to speak of. But there were a couple of memorable lines.........
Eli: How old will I be in 5004?
Uncle Buck: 5004? You'll be, like, 3,009.
Eli: Will I be dead by then?
UB: Well, that's not for me to say. But that would be pretty old.
Eli: I don't think I'll still be alive, then.
UB: Yeah, you may have a point. You know the stories in the bible about jesus?
Eli: Yeah...
UB: Well, he lived over 2000 years ago. It might seem like an awful long time, but we're closer right now to the times of jesus than we are to 5004.
Eli: Oh really. That must be a long time from now.
...............
Then there's Clara..... Three years old with curly blonde hair, blue eyes and been marching ot the beat of her own drum since day one.
UB watches Clara walk into the living room from the kitchen. She's sucking on a piece of candy or something; blue mouth, nose and chin.
UB: Whatcha eating Clara Rose?
She approaches with a blueberry grin.
Clara: Want some?
UB:What is it? A sucker?
Clara: Nope. Its chalk.
UB: You're eating blue chalk?
Clara: Yep. You want some?
lw
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Damn, El Dub, that made my day!
I like the Clara story.
Man, if you like kids so much, you want mine? Slightly used ungrateful brats aged 23 and 18. I'll pay the shipping
Yeah, JRL-bro, I love kids. And its a good thing, too. hehe
And I agree that Clara's first story is a gem. I live for those moments, but you have to grab on as they flow by or you can get stuck. I plan on using this thread to give/get an idea of where the kid's heads are at as we speak. I sure hope for more funny lines but will play with what's bein dealt.
Sarah: (4 year old family friend) Let's play house.
Susue: (6) OK. We can be twins. And our mom died.
Sarah: OK. And our brother died, too.
Susie: No, our brother is alive. Just our mom died.
Enter Nan: What are you girls playing?
Susie: House.
Nan: Do I get to be the mommy?
UB: Ah, I don't think you REALLY want that gig today, Nan.......
lw
Eli: All of us cousins got new nick-names last week.
UB: Oh yeah? What's yours?
Eli (With a hint of pride in his voice) : Deadly Farts.
UB: So, you got to pick your own name?
Eli: Yeah. How'd you know?
lw
ha, good one.
Clara I don't like uncle buck.
Marcie(adult family friend): Why don't you like uncle buck, Clara?
Clara: (In a little growl of a vioce that's almost scary the first couple of times you hear her us it): Because I'm mean.
Marcie: You mean because u-b is mean?
Clara (still in character): No! Because I'M mean....
Fortunately, about the time the uninitiated would be expecting Clara Rose to turn her little head around 270* and spew pea-soup-like vomitoid over her equally diminutive shoulder, the ju-ju passed and my niece reappeared.
lw
Love the kid stories LW... Here's one in return... During my last relationship, I came to fall head over heals in love with Amber... A dark haired imp that was just beginning to walk and talk when her mom and I got together... A few years rolled by.. One day; I had just come home from work, and as I walked into the living room, Amber is singing to herself....I was expecting something along the lines of 'itsy bitsy spider',,,well, not Amber...she began belting out "Ooh, that smell"!! Now, that song has some fairly harsh lyrics for a little lady of four to be singing, but Amber had changed the words... She stared up at the ceiling and smiled her dazzling smile, as she belted out ""Ooh that smell, can't you smell that smell, the smell of bodies burning?!?1---- I surely didn't expect that........... :shock: ----------- senorsal
:lol: lol :lol:
great stories
one thing that has always fascinated me about children is how sinister they can be, while still retaining an air of innocence...
There is an old black and white movie from the 50's that has always stuck in my mind... I think it was called Bad Seed or something similar...Had a lil blonde girl that was eerily evil....--------- senorsal
sally (5): What are YOU doing here?
me: Just hanging out with alice.
sally: Are you gonna baybsit us?
me: Heck no I'm not going to do any babysitting. Well, I may be sitting on this swing with a baby, but that doesn't mean I'm in charge.
sally: I don't WANT you to babysit!
me: I don't want that job, either. We're just sitting here minding our own business.
sally: Well, you're in charge then.
me: No I'm not. Your mom is in the house.
suzy (6): No she's not. She left.
me: I'm telling you, she hasn't gone anywhere.
suzy: Yes she did. She left out the back door and climbed the fence.
me: Where did she go?
suzy: To the Coolman's house across the street.
me : She didn't say anything to me about leaving.
sally: Well, that still means you are in charge, uncle buck.........
lw
So LW, you and Mrs. Willow got any seedlings in the works?
jrl: Nope.
Althoug the missus has been making comments about some ticking clock. hehe
(I think) I'm to the point where I'd dare have a kid without fearing I'd screw the poor little thing up too badly...
lw
No man,you'd be no worse and way better than sum. We need folks like you in the gene pool.
But keep on being with those kids, my wife's motto is teach the children and they will pass it on.
Leave it on, bro!
why let all that accrued wisdom slip out the back door
leave your mark
the scent of sanity
is nothin to sneeze at
judih
(helpful hints from the other side of the track)
I was watching the littles and middles the other day. Susie (6) was playing with a neighbor girl of the same age......
Katie C: Can we turn on the hose, Scott?
Susie: Call him uncle buck. Or u-b.....
Katie C: He doesn't care if we call him that?
Susie: Nope. He likes it.
Katie C (to me): What do you want us to call you?
me: I don't really care, Katie. Just don't call me late to dinner.
That last line was met with puzzled looks and giggles all around. The wife showed up to relieve me later. When she asked the girls what we'd been up to that day, they laughed and then katie explained how I'd told them they could call me anything but late for dinner, and how THATS what they had been calling me when I wasn't around ever since.......
I found a way to get on the same wave length with the boys awhile back, too. Getting them to talk about school, or anything really had been a little difficult. (I've been picking them up from school to take to guitar lessons thsi last year.) Anyway, I came up with the concept of a game awhile back that has changed things a little. The object of the game is to spot ups and fed ex trucks during the drive across town. (one person gets fed ex, the other ups.) Spotting your companies truck first gets you a point. Spotting your opponents truck before him/her removes a point from your opponents score. Mail trucks are wild, as are mailmen walking a route. I started the game once, the kids have picked it up from there. Eli and I have had a great time developing the rules. This may sound strange, but when one of the kids and I get on the same wave length of the game, a connection and conversation develops on its own. The boys now play anytime they are in a car together. The thing has taken on a life of its own and thats how I know we're on the right track. hehe
lw